Grumpy vs Mary Poppins

There are days when I get so grumpy I can’t even stand myself. I am not sure why it happens, or what causes it – if anything. I even have a couple of “Grumpy” T-shirts from Disney. One says “I’m Grumpy because you are Dopey”, but that’s another story.

I don’t plan on waking up grumpy. I don’t plan on not being in my usual perpetual happy mood. It just happens. And when it does, look out. Because I will enjoy being grumpy all day long. Even though I know I’m grumpy and even though friends and family try to coax me out of my bad mood, I choose to linger in it…to feel the grouchiness.

Now, I realize that isn’t really fair to those around me. Not just family and friends, but people in the checkout line at Kroger. People that are going 2 miles too slow in the fast lane. People that wore the wrong color that day. And most of all, I realize it’s not fair to me. Growing up a virtual Doris Day/Mary Poppins combination, being grumpy just does not suit me. I don’t even “do” it very well. Heck, half the time I am faking being grumpy just for the sake of not being nice.

Since I turned 50, I have decided to always (try to) be my authentic self. Which I thought meant whatever mood I’m in was to take precedence for the day. I’m realizing that isn’t true. My true self is just that…and nobody in the world is grumpy all the time. Well except for my ex-husband…and he said it was because he was married to Mary Poppins. Go figure.

Whenever I feel self-conscious about just being me, about wanting to laugh out loud and sing with the radio or dance to the music (which sometimes is just in my own head), I look at my 2 ½ year old granddaughter and my 3 year old dog. They don’t care or less what other people think. They both dance, and laugh and have a great time – almost all the time. Of course they both take lots of naps and eat with gusto without worrying about if they will fit into their jeans. No wonder they are happy all the time.

So my key to not being grumpy is to allow myself to figure out why I am being that way, and then to shrug my shoulders and dance or laugh it off – since the key to my authenticity is to not take myself too seriously – and not let my ego run my life. So, not everyone likes Mary Poppins. So what, who cares? I’m going to be my authentic happy (and sometimes grumpy) self, and if people don’t like it, they can just take it with a spoon full of sugar. Or salt, if you are drinking margaritas.

Blooming Where I am Planted

I grew up in Southern California where I learned how to body surf, eat granola and wear flip flops. I worked at Disneyland. Yes, I have blonde hair. (And It continues with age, thanks to my hairdresser, Andrea). My family still lives there, and I yearn for them and the ocean daily. But staying there just wasn’t in the cards.

I was “planted” in Ohio several years ago. Now, not being very good at geography in school (that and math were not my #1 choices), I wasn’t even sure where I was moving. They call it the “mid-west”, but if you look at a map, it’s kind of at the north eastern southern part of the country.

What I did know that instead of earthquake drills I’d have tornado sirens. I had heard the tomatoes were incredible and that there was lots of sweet corn. I was told there were tons of beautiful big trees and lots of wildflowers. No ocean, but lots of lakes and rivers.

Snow. Snow? I had to buy earmuffs and cute coats and matching mittens. I had to learn to scrape my windshield. My dog had to wear a sweater. Moving to Ohio was quite a culture and weather shock.

What I didn’t know was that I’d find home. So many people ask me: “What is a California girl doing in Ohio?” Well, here is my answer:

I am living – truly living. I have chosen to bloom where I was planted. I have found my true love and soul mate. I have the best friends ever. I live in a house that has the most peaceful view of the woods. I embrace and enjoy the change of the seasons. I have my children and soon to be 3 grandchildren. I don’t have traffic. I have great farmers markets and talented artisans living near me. I have my favorite restaurants and wine bars. I know some of the coolest people in the world. I get to go to great concerts and outdoor events. I can build a snowman….or watch my granddaughter do it and cheer her on. I can canoe on the river and bike alongside it. I can drive a short distance to snow ski or boat on one of the great lakes. I am not far from the east coast and am within driving distance to some of the most beautiful places in the country. Ah, maybe that’s what they meant by “middle America”.

Being an Ohio transplant has been a journey…but a joyful one at that. I guess you could say my heart is split; part in Ohio and part back in California, where my family and childhood memories reside.

I’ve learned to discover the richness of where I am planted. I’ve learned to have an open mind and learn about the people and the culture. I’ve learned to embrace my own inner California style, while living where there is no ocean.

The melting pot of my life just continues to evolve. I’ve created my own “garden” where I will continue to grow and bloom and thrive…and at times throw around some fertilizer for good measure!