A Letter From Charlie (the Dog)

Dear Aunt Nan:
My mom is making me write this. She said I have to apologize for peeing on your carpet. Twice. She said I have to buy you a bottle of Nature’s Miracle out of my next allowance…instead of the chew toy I wanted. I guess that’s ok, since I have an extra toy my granny gave me for Christmas.
Your carpet almost feels like grass – and I mean that in a good way. Mom doesn’t realize I was just testing it out….I didn’t mean to make a mess, honest.
My mom also said that next time I want to play with Cheyenne that she has to come to my house to play, since I am on restriction from going to your house. I don’t know what restriction means, but my mom was pretty serious when she said it. She also said that maybe this summer you would let me come over if I stay outside, and I said that would really be wonderful. I like your outside grass better, anyway.
Did you see the picture my mom showed you when we were there? My mom said that dog is what I am supposed to look like, but there was some kind of genetic mix up at the lab. Not sure what that means but she says she loves me anyway – and I DO know what that means. I don’t know if she told you, but we just found out I have some kind of lung condition. My lungs are quite scarred and it’s hard for me to breathe at times. The doctor said this could affect my quality of life. I don’t know why they are worried, since my life is grand and the quality could not be any better! (Did I mention the pills taste like yummy liver?)
Anyway, I am very sorry and am sending you many kisses. (Even though at times I’ve been told I may give too many. How can a dog give too many kisses?)
Don’t forget I love you. I have to go now, ‘cause my mom says I have to do my homework on account I have to go to special needs doggy school tomorrow, and the short bus comes very early.
Lots of licks, and a high five too,
Charlie
PS: My daddy just got home and said I didn’t have nice manners. I am not sure what that means, but I don’t think he’s happy either. I will charm him by dancing around him and showing him how much I love him. Remind me to show you that trick next time, ok?