Grumpy vs Mary Poppins

There are days when I get so grumpy I can’t even stand myself. I am not sure why it happens, or what causes it – if anything. I even have a couple of “Grumpy” T-shirts from Disney. One says “I’m Grumpy because you are Dopey”, but that’s another story.

I don’t plan on waking up grumpy. I don’t plan on not being in my usual perpetual happy mood. It just happens. And when it does, look out. Because I will enjoy being grumpy all day long. Even though I know I’m grumpy and even though friends and family try to coax me out of my bad mood, I choose to linger in it…to feel the grouchiness.

Now, I realize that isn’t really fair to those around me. Not just family and friends, but people in the checkout line at Kroger. People that are going 2 miles too slow in the fast lane. People that wore the wrong color that day. And most of all, I realize it’s not fair to me. Growing up a virtual Doris Day/Mary Poppins combination, being grumpy just does not suit me. I don’t even “do” it very well. Heck, half the time I am faking being grumpy just for the sake of not being nice.

Since I turned 50, I have decided to always (try to) be my authentic self. Which I thought meant whatever mood I’m in was to take precedence for the day. I’m realizing that isn’t true. My true self is just that…and nobody in the world is grumpy all the time. Well except for my ex-husband…and he said it was because he was married to Mary Poppins. Go figure.

Whenever I feel self-conscious about just being me, about wanting to laugh out loud and sing with the radio or dance to the music (which sometimes is just in my own head), I look at my 2 ½ year old granddaughter and my 3 year old dog. They don’t care or less what other people think. They both dance, and laugh and have a great time – almost all the time. Of course they both take lots of naps and eat with gusto without worrying about if they will fit into their jeans. No wonder they are happy all the time.

So my key to not being grumpy is to allow myself to figure out why I am being that way, and then to shrug my shoulders and dance or laugh it off – since the key to my authenticity is to not take myself too seriously – and not let my ego run my life. So, not everyone likes Mary Poppins. So what, who cares? I’m going to be my authentic happy (and sometimes grumpy) self, and if people don’t like it, they can just take it with a spoon full of sugar. Or salt, if you are drinking margaritas.